10 Reasons I Might Be A Vampire….

Lately I seem to stay up all night more often than not. I’m only averaging 3 hours of sleep a night. I’m beginning to believe my kids are right when they say I must be part vampire. Lets check and see.

How Do You Know If You Are A Vampire



1. Vampires stay up all night……….all the time, my sleep cycle has always been backwards….check


2. Vampires will burn if exposed to the sun……..more than five minutes and I will have blisters…check.


3. They can command you with their voice and eyes ……. Yes I can……(I’m a mommy)…check.


4. They do not cast a reflection….  I try never to look in the mirror if possible because it is scary, so maybe I don’t have a reflection……….check.


5. Vampires transform into another creature……my husband would agree that I do, at least once a month…..check.



6. Vampires promise mind altering sex……check :D



7. Vampires like to bite……only a little, I swear….check.



8. They need blood to survive……..yeah! 8 pints…..check.


9. Vampires can be killed if you drive a stake through their heart…..gruesome but I’m pretty sure I would too….check.



10.Vampires drink the blood of humans……what!…..wait!……no!



Okay, I guess I’m not a vampire. Because I draw the line at drinking blood (even Charlaine Harris’ True-Blood) although I do like my steak rare…hmm. But you have to admit 9 out of 10 is darn close. ha! ha! ha!

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About insider53

Wife, Mother, Grandmother, Friend, Writer, Voracious Reader, and so much more.
This entry was posted in general soapboxes, humor, passions and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

5 Responses to 10 Reasons I Might Be A Vampire….

  1. K says:

    BWAHAHAHAHAHA

  2. '79 says:

    LOL! Through the years, I’ve wondered from time to time… especially when I was in trouble… Ha ha ha!

  3. LisaF says:

    Hmmmm, I may resemble some of these remarks as well. Here it is, almost midnight and I’m to be up at 6am. Maybe 2-3 more hours than you, but still not a full night’s sleep. Spent 20 minutes in a tanning bed last week and fried myself so I’m thinking #2 is a go. #3 is a definite yes. #4 & #5, check. #6….no comment. #7…refer to #6. The Red Cross calls me all the time for my blood. Does that count for #8? #9 is just icky. #10…NO! I much prefer a nice, full-bodied red wine.

    Thanks for the giggle to end my day.

  4. Gibby says:

    Number 6 made me laugh out loud! Love it!

  5. Brian says:

    Wow, a lot of these symptoms are synonymous with alcoholism. I guess that’s the rest of us. Come get us vampires. I may not be dead, but my unit still works! Take me, Please!

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