passions and soapboxes

Summer is nearly here and with it comes family vacations. When my kids were little I always looked forward to these vacations. We would load up the RV and be gone for 3 to 4 weeks seeing the country. RVs work great for vacations if you have kids. I did not know this on our first family vacation so I booked a flight to Club Med. in the french west indies. We only had the girls then and they were 3, 4, and 8 years old, the perfect age for long flights and long layovers. What was I thinking!

We had to start our trip at 5 am and our day would not end for 10 hours. The girls were excited to go on a plane right until that defining moment when ’75 started vomiting in the airsick bag.  It also seems that ’79 has trouble with the pressure in her ears and the pain is making her cry. My husband and I are sitting in the window seat isle with ’80 and ’75 and ’79 in the isle seats across from us. I am giving ’79 gum and telling her to hum or grab her nose and blow real hard while holding the airsick bag for ’75  praying that we will be in the air soon and the seat belt light will go off so I can get her to the restroom. Did I mention we hadn’t taken off yet. I must have apologized 20 times to the people around us while asking to borrow their airsick bags, who were looking a little green themselves and a few were using their own airsick bags…..could it be because of us. Once we were airborne I moved ’75 to the restroom where she spent the entire flight to Dallas until it was time to land. The stewardess handed ’79 two Dixie cups and told her to put them over her ears to equalize the pressure. In the meantime while I am with ’75 our youngest ’80 figured out she had a captive audience and she should entertain them the whole trip by asking personal questions. The stewardess offered her a soda to get her to sit down and leave the passengers alone. I never let them have soda so she couldn’t have known what a mistake this was. By the time I brought ’75 back to her seat ’80 had had 3 sodas along with cookies and candy the other passengers had offered and she was on a sugar high of monumental proportions. Oh! where is my husband you ask. He grabbed a parachute and exited the plane an hour ago or at least that is how it felt at the time. So here we are on the first leg of our journey, preparing to land in Dallas. ’75 is still throwing up, ’79 has Dixie cups over her ears and is shouting “it hurts it still hurts” while ’80 is talking very fast and shaking her body and laughing and singing and talking and talking, Oh dear God! please get the plane on the ground now.

We are finally in the Dallas airport and I have 20 minutes to get some Dramamine, then figure out if I can drug an 8 year old, lie to my 4 year old to get her on the plane (“oh no honey this plane won’t hurt your ears, it’s different”) while my husband, who appeared as if by magic, takes ’80 to the restroom for the longest pee of her life and still make the connecting flight to Florida. Speaking of that connecting flight, many of the passengers on the flight to Dallas had the same connecting flight to Florida as we did and I saw them in the waiting area but for some reason they missed their flight. Could it have been something we said…. duh? Oh well, on to Florida and a 3 hour layover.

For more read part II